Don’t Stand By, Stand Up - What to Do When You Witness Harassment

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A photo of a white man with his arms around a female colleague's shoulders in an office. The woman looks uncomfortable. A different man, who is black, is looking at the camera with his hand out as if saying

 

Okay, here is another email, you’re going to want to save. Feel free to use this with staff during a special team meeting about allyship and sexual harassment.

You’re welcome!

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Witnessing harassment can be very unsettling, but as a bystander, you have the power to make a meaningful difference. Creating a safe and respectful workplace isn’t just about policies; it’s about how we show up for one another in moments that matter. Don’t we all want help when we’re in danger? If you’re ever in a position to safely help someone who is being sexually harassed, imagine they were someone close to you. You would want someone to intervene. This person can be you.

The following are a few strategies you can adopt when you witness sexual harassment.

  1. Intervene Directly (When Safe)

If it’s safe to do so (and only if it is), address the inappropriate behaviour calmly and assertively. Your intervention not only signals that harassment won’t be tolerated but can also discourage future incidents. Examples of what you might say include:

  • “That comment isn’t appropriate here.”
  • “I don’t think that’s the right way to speak to someone.”
  • “Let’s keep the conversation professional, shall we?”

The key is to remain calm and avoid escalating the situation. Your tone and approach should aim to de-escalate while firmly setting boundaries.

  1. Use Distraction Techniques

In situations where direct confrontation might escalate tensions or feel unsafe, a subtle distraction can defuse the moment. Examples include:

  • Starting a conversation with the person being targeted to shift their focus. You could say something like,

“Oh my goodness X, did you watch Traitors last night?”

  • Creating a reason for the target to leave the situation, such as asking for help with a task.

“Hey X, I think my computer has frozen, would you mind having a look at it?”

  • Accidentally drop something near the person being targeted and ask for help picking it up.
    “Oh no! I’ve just dropped all my papers, X, could you help me?”

These actions provide a temporary reprieve and can prevent the incident from escalating.

  1. Offer Support to the Affected Person

Once the immediate situation has passed, check in with the person affected with kindness. Let them know you saw what happened and that you’re there to support them. You could say:

  • “I hope you didn’t mind me interrupting, you looked like you needed help. How are you feeling?”
  • “That didn’t seem right, do you want to talk about it?”
  • “Is there anything I can do to help you feel supported?”

Respect their wishes if they don’t want to discuss it further, but reassure them that they’re not alone.

Why Your Actions Matter

Being an active bystander helps create a culture where harassment is less likely to occur because potential perpetrators know there will be consequences.

If you are a leader, encourage your team to use this guide as a resource for understanding their role in creating a safer workplace. We expand on this topic and more in our CPD-accredited course ‘Understanding Sexual Harassment’. Take a look  or book a call with me to discuss your organisation’s needs. 

Truly wishing you all the best!

Bye for now

Rebbecca Hemmings

Director

Talking about racism can seem difficult and uncomfortable. This CPD accredited course provides a foundational education on racism to help to increase racial literacy which includes building confidence to speak about and deal with issues concerning race. It provides a language through which meaningful conversation can take place (particularly in the workplace).

Time to Talk about Race Online Course

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